Spam me, please...


Anonymous guestbook entry (by "klisdfkhj" on April 5th 05 18:22):

First I thought that there was no god.  But then I quit my job.  After  the breakup tottally wasted bus exploded horribly after the stalkings were full of dog crap but it wasn't completely truthfully dog but cat crap.  After the madman freed the jews, Hitler got pissed, leading to castration. He was no fool of testification, after having his haircut at the local school of Portugal in Zimbawe. They didn't cut the shirt off his back, though he killed with cross. The vampires got laid at the funeral where Bob Hope was raped on the coffin because diarrhea set in. The attacker got computers are fun, because he raped a microsoft moniter.  Bill Gates got decapitated on national radio broadcast out of the park, in dowtown New Hampshire of Mordor. After returning the ipod to the ipod wraiths of ribbins and hairspray. Professer Evil got a shotgun from HTML processers inc. also known as Viagra. He got a headphones are not edible, while using Viagra monthly. Bombs are nuclear fission powered, kitties with spikes. Raynor enjoyed the company of the kitties because the spikes filled him with glee. "Go my kitties! To the guestbook! Muhahahahahaha!" That will be it.
Comment: Although primarily designed to lead astray anti-spam software (Goodman et al. 2005), these texts unintendedly may exhibit subtle literary qualities... I found out that someone else had the idea before: Links to Kristin's spam poetry or to Ben Brown's robotic spam poetry no longer exist, but the compendium of spam madness by  Lester Haines was still available in 2025.

6/05MB 7/05  > 7/05

J.Goodman, D.Heckerman, R.Rounthwait (2005) Schutzwälle gegen Spam. Spektrum der Wissenschaft Juli 05, 93-100

Spam prosa obtained from "Independent Lab." <britt@davis.org> on Wed, 01 Jun 2005 15:26:

Buckley ascertain, I is greenness his. Irruption must emperors them earmarks. We minstrels you patent denmark might revelry her. lt crotch she counterman Cyrus be ambitions yours. Baton's are Algerian, its be hell's muzzle. Fabricates homesickness, they were Natalie them. Panama hollow we is coy theirs luminary. Lavishing monstrosity he might brought me Pravda. Scratchy were myrtle, them are capaciously rinses. Bayonets entreated, they prospector shrugging would message's them. Menucrypt I may Buddhist them. They emphasizing it atrocious bleakly are pines mine. Bolted would bangs theirs bedbugs lubricant's. Booksellers may constrained your Malraux. Mania ironic, you pursued gridiron does accredit yours. Sanderson drapes, he investigating rattlesnakes did fluctuate mine. Betters had been absorptions them clams. Sector's I is Russo, me impartially. Shelby leitmotif, I may inscrutable his. Shaft's peacocks I may penicillin its. Exquisitely were Goliath its fitly autocorrelate. lt Moriarty would semester's its. Catholics crops, they nuns flights does goblin your. Covers is hose's them blink sanctuary's. Aplenty could individualism your Shulman compactest. Architectural did rightfully, me does activist's fight. Accuses scarcity, we broomsticks causality are adhered its. He sat it pediatrics hovel did capturing mine. I skyscraper being raiding yours. Responsibility has been Guggenheim, her could alienated Grenoble. You mother's be fear her. Envisage she does Carolyn, yours atomize. Rind being headland, its are Wordsworth cackle. Any were casualty, mine may absorbency indebtedness. Scald are Joaquin he humped saves. He girder's would arclike him. He Stockton did restrictively hers. We multiprogrammed be Chatham your. Brisker may appreciative his ruin lax. Apricots can frontal me nations monolith. Olga rims, it could disgruntle yours. Inexact were frightens, her being secede Selkirk. Fabian ability's, we ringing Sabine had been prejudices me. He coroner did impediments. Edwin I would caterpillar's, theirs anemia. Flange Gorton, they pine infest might circle yours. Asher redistribute we can Japanese them palette. Inflexible faker we have been barn's her geese. Carolingian hoy, it does parks its. Fissile can scrawling his reabbreviate. Shamefully attraction's, he populace displacing has been hung his. She breeze it avoided befog were concert her. Redraw denounces I have betrothal me. Dignitary disturbance she being profitable. Precepts clinch, they fruit's jill might delineates your. Protestor's Darrell, you might bounding me. Gripped might connected, them be disturbs evoking. I ironings have semaphores.

*
Spam poetry obtained from “Julie Metcalf”:
on June 21st 05

on June 24th 05

you rudolph me
slew me
you whirligig me
abstain me

you hypotenuse me
inclement me
you heliocentric me
detour me

you alton me
cockcrow me
you gallium me
vaporous me

you revving me
apathy me
you posthumous me
blum me

*

you flo me
arbutus me
you corkscrew me
perforate me

you deoxyribonucleic me
encryption me
you forfeiture me
buddha me

you burglar me
impinge me
you float me
condolence me

you paraboloidal me
julius me
you canine me
barbour me

you backhand me
corny me


*

Spam poetry of the depressive kind:

Basically not much notable happening. I've just been hanging out not getting anything done. My life's been completely boring today. That's how it is. I haven't been up to much today. I've just been letting everything pass me by , but it's not important.

(obtained Nov 2nd from loans@mail.com, unsigned)


tiks texas holdem from Greece wrote on November 24. 2005:===============================================

As for continual contradiction...

And I won't explain myself because I...

Of situating suitable characters on the level of his supreme simplicity...

...novelty...

...we...

 

Writing a manifesto

and there's nothing I want

and yet...

Pharmaceutical preparations...

...a naked leg being...

...attitude...

...a passing positive sign....

 

The forest...

I am writing a manifesto...

...level of his own intelligence...

...like!

Situating suitable characters on the level...

Ardent and sterile...

Spring...

The love...

Principle...

 

I am against manifestos as I am.

Plot a talking and selfdefining story...

...are being human and true in relation to innocent pleasures?

Manifestos as I am against...

...life...

To be plain...

The amusement...

The amusement of redbellies?

On the level of his own intelligence...

...like chrysalises on...

Approximation was invested...

 

Wait for years in the forest...

I...

===============================================

(It's heart-breaking, isn't it?)

(colors, dots, and line breaks added)